To Whom It May Concern,
My name is Dr. Charley West and I am the proprietor of The Smoking Musket, a sports blog dedicated to West Virginia University Mountaineers athletics. In that capacity, I have had the distinct pleasure of covering Jeff Mullen's tenure here at our beloved school. Without hesitation, I would recommend him for the available head coaching position at Kent State University.
In the three years of running the offense here at WVU, Mr. Mullen has truly been offensive. The variety between running and passing, whether successful or not, has been extraordinary. His tactics are, quite simply, breathtaking, so much so that it is difficult for us fans to properly voice our approval of this playcalling. Instead, because we are in so in awe of his schemes, cheers are often misconstrued as constant booing, which is the sound made when one tries to root on emphatically while having his or her breath stolen by an offensive genius.
It's also clear his expertise knows no bounds. What look like mistakes of the highest magnitude to outsiders are used as a ploy to lure opposing teams into a false sense of security. Sometimes, these intricate ruses last more than just one game. Mr. Mullen knows, however, that a loss this year (or next, or even the year after that) may mean the difference at some undetermined point down the road, and he is more than willing to take that chance.
Lastly, in my time covering Mr. Mullen, I have not known him to steal office supplies, embezzle funds, or sleep with female (or male) graduate assistants. His personal hygiene strikes me as nothing less than impeccable.
With that said, I desperately hope that you take him off our hands hire Jeff Mullen to be the next head coach at Kent State University.
Sincerely,
Dr. Charley West