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Want To Rename Our Mascot? Yeah, Didn't Think So

OK, so some ridiculously hippie-leaning environmental group is sponsoring a contest to rename WVU's mascot, since West Virginia apparently doesn't have any mountains left.  Funny, as I look out my window, all I can see is mountains.  I also drove from Charleston to Morgantown today and had to take quite a few turns -- it sure didn't feel like Kansas.  But I digress.

Whatever your views on mountaintop removal, I think we can all agree that this is the stupidest contest in a long, long time.  I really would like to win the contest and the $100, then burn it ceremoniously before the first football game.  Or shove it up the group's collective ass.  Either would work.

OK, so here's my challenge: win this contest.  Win it so that this money and "respect" doesn't go to someone who truly believes the Mountaineer should have a new name.  And post your ideas in the comments.  Bonus points for snarkiness...obviously.