Amid the recent recruiting bonanza, conference realignment rumors, and discussion about the potential of the WVU baseball program, you may have missed a rather innocuous shuffling of titles and duties on the basketball coaching staff. Specifically, Bob Huggins announced last week that Billy Hahn, who has been with Huggins since Huggy arrived in Morgantown in 2007, is being...uhh...promoted?...to the position of "Assistant to the Head Coach," while Jerrod Calhoun is being moved from Director of Basketball Operations to a spot on the bench as Assistant Basketball Coach.
The immediate effect of this move appears to be that Calhoun can involve himself more in recruiting as an assistant coach rather than simply being relegated to an administrative role. On the other hand, Huggins had this to say about the move and what it means for Hahn:
"At this juncture where the program is with nine new guys, we felt with my schedule and as much time I spend out of the office recruiting and with speaking engagements, that we needed someone who has sat in the head coaching chair, particularly with the amount of new guys we have," says Huggins. "Obviously, Billy’s experience gives us that person to serve as my aide in administrative matters and with the overall day-to-day operations of Mountaineer basketball."
Of course, there has to be more to the story than just shuffling guys around. We imagine the exchange went something like this:
: Billy, thanks for coming in. I was just getting ready to head out with Jarrod and get a head start at happy hour down at Keglers, so I'll try to make this brief. You're getting a promotion.
: It's about damn time. Are you retiring?
: Not exactly. Your new title will be Assistant to the Head Coach. Jerrod will be taking your spot on the bench as Assistant Basketball Coach.
: Umm, well...if I'm not going to be on the bench, what the hell am I going to do?
: You're going to be in charge of managing my Twitter account, ordering the wings and booze for post-game parties, and making sure my track suit is freshly washed every night. You know, important front office duties like that.
: Can I still wear my black turtleneck? Please tell me I don't have to wear a tie. I look like a banker when I wear a tie, and you know I suck at counting small bills. And what about my summer vacation? Can I still take that trip to Pigeon Forge?
: All right Billy, here's what I'm going to do. Holgs and I are going to be taking a few fishing trips this summer and are planning to drink a lot of dark liquor. While you're a nice enough guy, I can't take you with me. See, the only clothing you own are those black turtlenecks, which are fine in the winter when we're at the Rat Pack or actually coaching basketball, but they kind of creep me out when I'm wading in the middle of the Greenbrier River with a trout line in the water and a fifth of jack in my back pocket. But I need somebody to come in and take over the holiday and weekend work calendar.
: Good. Excellent, it'll be fun. Because Ollie, uh, wants someone to be here on Saturdays in the summer. And so we're going to have to have some people come in on the weekend, and I know nobody's gonna want to do it and I know everybody's gonna complain and bitch and I don't want to have to deal with that.
: And that's why you have Assistant Basketball Coaches.
: Well, actually no. They're going to be out on the road recruiting and fundraising. That's why I have an Assistant to the Head Coach.
: Same thing.
: No, it's not. It's lower, so...
: Actually, it's not. So what I want you to do, Billy, is to go out and tell the rest of the coaches to meet us at Chic-n-Bones after they're done with film. Let them know that you're the designated driver, and that you're going to pick us up around 1 tonight and then drive us to the airport in the morning too. Also, tell them to leave their practice gear at the Coliseum so you can wash it this weekend while we're gone.
: Okay, you know what? This isn't working because...uh...I'm...they're my subordinates.
: Ah, yes you are, I am the Assistant Head Coach.
: Assistant TO the Head Coach.
: Which means absolutely nothing.
: Well, it's mostly made up.. so..


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