John Marinatto's Big East Re-Draft

In a Smoking Musket exclusive, our spies have managed to, ahem, "acquire" John Marinatto's plan to completely re-draft the Big East as his lasting legacy:

First order of business is to jettison the remaining football schools - we would be right where we are now, with or without 'em and I'm tired of hearing them bitching and moaning.

New Members

The city of Providence, RI - such a lovely city and I have waterfront property there

Abe Froman, sausage king of Chicago - I love DePaul and he'd be a natural rival...plus, who doesn't love sausage?

Greg Robinson - he damned near killed football at Syracuse (I wish he could have stayed longer) and this'll make sure it never comes back to our BASKETBALL conference

Pat's King of Steaks - I heard Oliver Luck (I hate that guy) is a Geno's guy

[image via www.soulfulplanet.com]

Father Guido Sarducci - I need someone who I can count on to keep the Catholic schools in line

[image via www.writeonnewjersey.com]

The Cast of Jersey Shore - They bring great Italian food and I've always had a crush on that Snookums girl WROAR

Madison Square Garden - because F#$% JOHN SWOFFORD, that's why!!  This arena belongs to ME!!!

Bacon - bacon is the only food that you can add to virtually any other food and instantly make it better.  It should certainly improve the conference in the same way.  Gotta have bacon!!!

[image via www.bbqaddicts.com]