Rules to being a WVU fan

1. Never schedule anything important on a day WVU is scheduled to play football. Don't work. Don't get married. Don't have a baby. Don't die. There are typically 353 other days of the year to do those things on. Choose one of them!

2. Never attend a wedding during a WVU football game unless you carry a TV... and watch it during the ceremony and reception. 

3. It is against the rules to not wear gold or blue on ANY game day. More points go to those wearing football jerseys, hats, t-shirts,sweatshirts, pants, boxers, jewelry, and jackets, preferably all at the same time. Old gold and blue always works. Anything else is always gay.

4. Always, and I mean ALWAYS, return any "Lets Go" with a hearty"Mountaineers!" This is true even during funerals, sex, in foreign countries or when witnessing the birth of your child.

5. Every vehicle you see while driving that contains a Pitt or Virginia Tech sticker should be honked at then flipped off. To be on the safe side, do this to every car with a Pennsylvania or Virginia license plate.

6. When Notre Dame plays Pitt, it is mandatory to despise both teams. There are no winners.

7. You cannot have a second favorite football team behind WVU. You are only permitted to have another team that you hate the least.

8. It is OK to be emotional (and even "tear" up) during the following:

-First beer of the first tailgate of the season 
-Your child's first WVU game
-When the band plays the Alma Mater, Simple Gifts, or Country Roads
-When Tony Caridi says, "It's a great day to be a Mountaineer wherever you may be!" 
-Watching the sun rise on the way to a game
-Anytime anyone mentions Miami and blocked punt in the same day
-WVU winning the National Championship

9. Always take off your hat during the Alma Mater and physically remove the hats of anyone in your vicinity who fails to do so.

10. Tailgating is mandatory. And by tailgating, you must be drinking beer before 6:00 AM. This includes both home and away games. 

11. When you die, you must have at least one item of WVU memorabilia with you. (Specify which one in your will, that way your spouse won't pick something stupid).

12. Your children should be taught to let you know when they "have to take a Panther."

13. You are forbidden to fall for the National Media crap sandwich that JoePa is still a "good guy." In reality, he is a bitter senile old man reduced to a cheerleader and referee-baiter. His credibility went south forever when he hired Galen "Cheatin" Hall to resurrect his sorry football program.

14. Recruiting must be followed as intensely as any game. This is true even if it puts your job/career at risk.

15. Attend the Spring Game. It makes it easier to survive the summer.

16. Try to never boo a former or current WVU football player who is playing in the NFL .

17. Correct anyone who doesn't refer to WVU as "THE" only real college in West Virginia.

18. ESPN employees must be verbally taunted at every opportunity. 

19. Hang a WVU flag every day. If any of your neighbors counter with a VT/Pitt flag, it is your solemn duty to tear it down and deface it anyway you see fit.

20. It is important to consider the "good old days" ARE NOW. Enjoy them!!!!!