Pam Ward Haunts My Dreams

Football season is right around the corner. Excitement fills the air. Even when you are most excited and jubilant, there is a creeping thought in the back of your head that something might still go wrong.

That creeping lesbian of a thought is Pam Ward.

Actually, I don't mean to call Pam Ward a lesbian. Her bad announcing is worthy to stand on it's own for ridicule. And ridicule you must. I suggest you get started now, since you only have 8 days (hey, like Hanukah!) to touch on all of her awfulness.

Pam Ward is the reason I hate noon games. I don't care if we're playing Fairmont State in the Sideyard Brawl...if that game is at noon, I am immediately terrified that Pam Ward might be announcing it for ESPN2. I would be happier having the game not televised at all. Come to think of it, if given the choice between losing a game or winning a game announced by Pam Ward, there would be a looooong pause before I gave my answer.

Still thinking.

So when I took a look at this year's schedule, I wasn't thrilled seeing both Mississippi State and UConn at home...at noon. These are classic Pam Ward games, outside of her annual Wisconsin-Illinois tilt. The moral of the story is -- beware. These noon games are just around the corner. Try your damnedest to get tickets and light your DVR on fire before leaving for the game. You'll thank me later.

Also, thank me now for only being able to find such a small picture of Pam.